After Cancer: Things are Okay

The good weather has led to the trees being weighted down by all the fruit that they are holding. It looks like it's going to be a good year for fruit and most importantly, wine.

I am still feeling quite good since my commencement of self medicating with the LT3. I can only hope that I can convince my doctors back in Canada to prescribe it for me when I get back, if indeed I decide to go back.

This brings me to a pet peeve of mine. My biggest peeve with the medical community, is doctor's refusal to prescribe medication (not narcotics) that makes the patient happier and more functional. I do believe that doctors are too concentrated on controlling the blood test results. Those "within normal range" blood test results usually come at the cost. In my case, it was the feeling of never ending doom that encapsulated my entire being with the indestructible steel bars of the mind. Their focus on blood test results almost resulted in my passage to that other place. I was that close to walking that road.

I believe that a doctor's duty is to make their patient well, if it is possible, and if everything that they have tried in the past isn't working, they should be willing to work with the patient and try something different. A doctor who solely focuses on the lab tests and dismisses the way the patient is feeling, is of no use to the patient. That is my opinion.

I think doctors should be more courageous with the treatment of their patients because to continue walking the same path which has hailed no results in the past, will most likely lead to the same destination of no results. This lack of open mindedness in the medical community needs to end.

After Cancer: The weather is fine

It's been awhile since my last posting.

The weather here in sunny Portugal hasn't been very sunny for the last several days. Today, that has seemed to change. The sun is shining and the birds are singing, and I along.

Being a cancer survivor has taught me many things in life. It has driven me to the depths of hell and has risen me to the grace of light. In reflection, I welcome both.

It's never an easy road, tho. That is a given. Being 'property' of hospitals and doctors, tears and fear, good words and bad, has certainly given me a different perspective. Every day is a blessing, whether it is filled with pain, or filled with joy. We just need to understand it, and accept it as evolution of oneself. I would never be the person I am today unless I had experienced all the sorrow that I have experienced throughout my very difficult lifetime. I don't think that I would have said these words two years ago.. I don't think I would have said these words eight months ago. But today, the sun is shining bright. It brings warmth, and love, and joy and yes, it also brings hope for tomorrow.

I can only hope that those of you who are in that cold, unforgiving pit, that you find the courage within yourself to stay strong and continue to hope for a better tomorrow. No matter how long you have been in the depths of hell, there is hope for you. Believe me when I say that I was probably the most cynical person alive when it came to feeling hopeful for myself, for my life, for anything good to come my way, but that has happened finally, and it feels terrific!

Stay strong!

Peace to those who don't have it, love to those to crave it, joy to those who are crying.

After Cancer: A New Day Has Come

This Holiday Season was quite an unusual one, since everything that I had been accustomed to during the Holidays all my life, changed. This year, my Holidays were not spent with a lot of family in the house as usual, but rather with only three people, I included in that mix.

I am spending the winter in Europe and have had some mixed emotions over the last several months on how I feel about this endeavor of mine. It has had it´s pluses and it´s negatives, that is a certainty.

I can´t say that I miss the Canadian snow at all, but I do miss my family and friends who stayed behind.

Along with being in a country where prescription medication laws are not as rigorous as in Canada, comes an opportunity for self medication. That´s what I have been up to and can say that I am doing a great job.. I say this not out of arrogance, but out of hope and joy.

You see, that cytomel that I have mentioned is an over the counter medication here, and it is dirt cheap. I have been taking it for the last few months and feel much much better.

You never know, I might decide to stay.